Betraying the Oyster

Recently I blogged about irrational thinking, which I uncovered as a personal vice during therapy. I discovered that a lot of self-doubt and thinking patterns translate into unrealistic things my brain comes up with. Often I would assume because something didn’t work out, it was because I had done something to deserve it or I had caused some sort of sabotage unknowingly. I would even go as far as to think that a situation turned sour because the person/s involved wanted to avoid me. My mind would start to spin in ways that betrayed healthy thinking and personal grown. Sometimes these feelings pass like a wave, once they crash they dissipate and don’t resurface. Though, every once in a while I ride this wave for longer than it serves its purpose. Weeks, even months, sadly even years may go by and I still come back to a situation, replaying it over and over again.

After this epiphany in therapy I realized how often I overthink situations and tend to lean towards the negative. Honestly before this was pointed out to me, I had no idea I was doing it. My mind has been betraying my heart and soul almost daily.

Since becoming aware of my tendency for irrational thinking, I have been able to objectively shut it down quite often. I have also made sense of some past experiences that continued to replay in my head.

Maybe you are in the same situation as me. You think to yourself, I can’t do that or I’m not smart enough to take on that challenge or I don’t fit in there. My lesson is that we shame ourselves when our mind betrays us. It tells us we are not worthy of something, when the truth is the world is our oyster. Catch yourself doing it, recognize you are making up these negative ideas that serve no purpose and often hold no truth, and then let that sh## go.

Response to Daily Prompt: Betrayed



  1. Used to do this a ton, that’s good youre getting a grip on it.

    Thankfully in time it has dissipated and I no longer blame myself for things that did happen or things that I imagined happening (eg imagined scenarios at work, people not returning calls etc) – the imagined things were always worse :/ – the what ifs?

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Just bringing awareness to it has helped, but it isn’t a change that occurs overnight. Getting a grip on it is a good way to describe my progress.

      Liked by 1 person

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